pre U life~

i like to called myself as a pre university student..
as this can show that i'm getting much bigger elder n higher..
actually i didn't know that y did i chose such way..
the road never taken.. i miss u actually..
but i knw i had walked for a distance...
i forced myself not to make a U turn..
i knw im front there stil got another short cut to go..
but i tell myself not to go there..
i wish to enjoy the way i walk along this road..
i'm happy now.. even thought i hurt by many roots n leaf..
but i knw those scar wil let me grow much bigger..

on the way going, i met a lot of travellers too..
i met some senior who already travelled for 1year..
they shared their experience..
they taught me alot..
i wont forget them until my life end..

besides that, those travellers are also friendly to know about..
we share we joy while we walking in the journey..
i wil continue my journey.. yes, i will!!

waiting~

u knw that i wont wait for ur return..
as i knw that u wont return too..
from that day u told me u wont, i tel myself i wont wait too..
u always break ur promise..
since the first day we started, until the last day we ended..

do u stil rmbr?
that day when u came back..
u told me.. or i shud say that u asked me to...
u asked me to wait for u..
u tel me all the bad things that u faced from ur new girl..
u tel me that u wil leave her as fast as u can..
are my heart happy? no, sorry..
i din even happy..as i din wanted u to come back too..
but i felt happy when u realised that i'm better than her..
that is enuf..enuf to relief my pain..
my pain.. from the last day u hurt me with her good n benefits..
all the hurt had been relief after u realised..

anyway, i wont wait for ur return..
i didn't start for another relation, doesn't mean that i miss u..
jz means that i understood the consequence for every relation..

u din made me angry..
u din made me cry..
u din have such big influence as u thought..

from our photo~

suddenly, i refer back to my friendster account..
i saw alot of photos.. alot of memory recall me..
so happy to get back my old photo which i lost last time..
but..
when i click in a private folder...
i saw our photo inside..
yes, i haven delete the album yet..
y i din did so? i dont know.. and i dunwan to knw too..
but when i saw each photo, my heart seems like talking somethings to me..
the heartbeat is abnormal.. but i knw its not the beat that called miss..
i knew that i already put it off..put it down..even thrown..
but i stil save the album..maybe is jz for memory..
maybe?? not.. its true that is for memory~

our photo recalled our happy moment along that 1 and a half year..
r we that close? unable to remind myself..
i miss that sweet n close feeling..
but i not miss u..

NS's life~

hmmm...wat to say..
in NS i found that i changed much..

first of all, i knw many new fren by my own..
as u all who knw me know that i'm a person who duno or anti social~
something like that la.. but on the first day i went to camp, i can make fren easily..

maybe bcoz everyone also alone there n need a fren..
so as our target is the same, then we made frenzz..
so glad i met some of the best fren..
some of them is from klang too..

but i quite sad n disappointed that i cant knw more fren from other places..
as i knw, the camp only received students from selangor, kl and perak~

wat the XXXXXXXX.. the camp's location at perak but stil got perak ppl got choose to perak camp.. so every week their parents wil visit them n make us felt jealous~
shit! but nvm la.. when their parents came, we wil tumpang kasih n eat with them..haha >.<

ok..i think the most benefits for us is.....is we got free lunch there..
everythings we ate are free~haha ^^ the activities actually not bad la..

but if wan us kawad under the sun with the thick askar wear........................
it really changed everyone to darknessssss...not only the skin dark~the mental of us also dark~~
fainting all the time..
even wearing nice baju kebudayaan, we need to kawad too..ya la, disiplin~
so far so good lor~

hmmm..the place we sleep stil clean n neat..good~
the toilet~~~~~~ok lor.. "mei hiam beh pai" "ai hiam kanasai" lehhhhh ~

my frenzzz!!!! miss u all...

hey, my frenzzz.. i really miss u all very much...
haiz...in NS..... i felt myself changed much..
really hope that my fren wont forgot me~
that day i got my phone n sms one of my fren..
she (jing) said that she so miss me.. that second i really felt touch..~
i really miss all of u..
i felt so sad..bcoz i couldn't celebrate my cny with all of u..
so wasted..~ need to blame my NS~
the holiday gave to us are so less..only 4days..
wat to do....i need to back my hometown in penang~
so i straight from my camp back to penang..but then no time to return klang d..
sry my fren.. i really miss all of u and wish to meet u all..
but so sry.. i cant... the time not allow..
i also din apply for longer holiday~
bcoz 17feb we wil start M16!!!!yeahhhh~
i dunwan to miss this chance..
i being that black now i think is worth if i got M16 b4..rite??
hope u all wont forgot me n wont blame me...
duno hw u all's life for the past 1month..
i jz knw that my life in NS is the same everyday..and i already suit myself in it d..
fren....miss u all a lot...

something about love~

i felt somethings after my spm..
i felt i had grow up..be more mature...
when i tidy up our memory, i remembered many things..
i felt last time is a childish game.. is an immature game..
but i felt after this love, i having a tough mission to back into true love...
i changed..
i forgot him..really..i did it...
i dun care him..
i can live without him..from begining i did it too..
i love myself so much..
i dress up myself..
i care my image..
i proved to myself finally that i really put down every sadness or hateness..
yeah~~!!!

happy?? yaya^^

somemore..........i felt something.... i miss him....erm..maybe cannot use miss..but i wish to have a even higher level of relationship with him....

happy go lucky^^ yahoooooorayyyyy!!!

the theif~

hmmmmm~ duno who always wil visit my blog....??
anyway, jz wan to inform i wont so often update my blog..so sorry to let u all have a disappointed feeling after view my blog every time..

haiz..ask me y???haizz..sad to say it..
i also forgot did i said it b4...

the theif..is it theif??i also duno whether my broken english simply used the word..
actually i jz suspect is him la...but my sense told me ya, is him..
but i also din saw him b4..haiz..
i duno y he wan break in my hse..i also not staying in banglo..
but maybe jz bcoz not banglo so he can break in without escapre from cctv..
wat to do...haiz...
i lost my pc on that day.....so sad..
evendol that lettop not mine(was my sis), but i stil sad with it..
haiz..i sad bcoz of inside have all my documents, photos,memory!!!!!!!
all gone in jz that second... :(
so hurt so sad..
i sad bcoz of that is my only line to connect, to have fun, to relax, and also to revise!!!!!!!
i hate him...even a little step pull out my memory on him...
b4 having spm...i need my lettop to do my revise...
looking my fren all transferring others state's trial paper to do or spot the question...
wat can i do?? stay at home to face the book... i really felt sad...
all the file inside my pen drive but i cant do anythings wit it...
i went my fren hse, this is the only way..but, ppl's hse also not suit to stay for so long..
and also not felt comfort when using the pc...
i sad bcoz of the lettop is a very very very old fashion, old version, old model, stil very heavy to carry...y the ppl stil wan to steal it.......??!!!???!!!???!!!!!!!!
he got the RMxx.xx , but destroy my whole future....!!!!
maybe i said like this is too "kua zhang", but i really felt that...

anyhow, this case past so long and i ended my spm too...BUT, i stil hate him..
if have a chance to meet him, i sure wil let him die in front me!!! @#$%^&(*&^%$#$%^&