the truth of the world~

dont know wat happen to me this few days..
suddenly think of many future life..

i watched tv 2day..
an activity i almost forgot..
then....my sick started..
shit..wat a bad sick is this..
psycho thinking maybe..

i saw the drama...
her husband had a relation with another girl..
somemore got pregnant..omg..
the girl forgive him..
why??
should she do so??
a person she loved..
a person she got hurt from..
is it worth?

wat wil be if is me??
i think again...

i went ktv with fren..
saw the mv..
gosh~ seeing your bf with another girl..
how damn close they are..
the girl run away, the guy chase up..
so??
first, think -ve, no forgiveness..
got once means got twice..
second, think +ve, he leave the girl in the room, and chase for u..
he stil care for u..
at last he stil back to u..
he cried for u..
he beg u..
means??
how bad your man be at outside, he will back home too..
is it??
which one u choose?

i asked them..
my fren choose the first..
no way to forgive..
and they always say i'm so emo so optismist..
but i chose second actually..they dont know..

actually i realised many meaning this few days..
suddenly i think that is true that everythings had the other way..
jz see how u think it..
so how my thinking??

i wonder why there is so many choice of thinking too..
a guy who love u..
who confess to u...
how to prove the truthly love u??
if u realised his past,
and know how faithful he is..
so wat?
u can think that he is really faith..
a good guy..
can consider..
second, he is jz showing off..
is jz one of his technique ok...
so he can get to u easier and no need any approvement..

oh god~wat u wan me think of?

first and second..
clever or stupid..
smart or dan cun..
mature or childish..
which one??

why am i thinking such stupid things?
why am i plan so much silly things?
is it it is near to the end of world?
is it this shows the sign to death?
is it i had been getting old?
is it i'm abnormal?
is it i'm overthinking again?
i need a person to speak to..
but duno who should i..
who wil not scolding me??

sometimes i jz wan to be simple..do wat i wan..not to think..not to decide..regret on fast decide..isn't that easy?

dont ask~

since you know wat u going to do..
then wat for u ask me again??
you jz wan to confirm that your decision is right..
so wat u going to do wil be more comfort for you..

but sorry,
u doesn't know that i'm not comfort at all..

please la..
not the first time u did so..
i'm tired k..
i not worth to let u stay and accompany as u said..
i'm fine to be independent k?
jz the way u think..
u tot it is like this..and u act..
u try to attract my attention maybe..
jz using your way to force me to agree with u..
do u know?
every time i agree, actually is reluctantly..
dont u know??
if u really wish to accompany, please...
do it nicely..
use your heart....
your heart to express...
not to plan a lie...
not to act a movie...
a drama...

psycho~

dont ask why i'm psycho~
i just knew it..
i got a psycho family indeed~

the rod wont be straighten..
since the beginning of the rod is bent..

headache family headache life~

acting?

suddenly i refers back to the blog~~
and i got a conclusion..
you're acting..
sorry..
i jz can say so..
you say u dont like to act, you dont want to be fake.
but the situation now is act.
i dont believe that is really like that..
like wat u done to hurt..
to let the time to be pass..
is acting, isn't?

and i wish to ask u, when is the short term u means??
after deepavali?
after lower six?
after upper six?
after trial?
after stpm?
after our U-life?
no such ending?

hey, i wish to express my feeling..
please dont be too purposely to ignore me k?
even i understand wat u doing, also wil be hurted k?
can u turn the other way of your thinking?
can u stand in the point of view of mine?
can u refresh back if i did the same things as u to u?
u sure wil say "wei..piang eh..dont emo.."
ur heart sure wil felt somethings right?
its same goes to me k..
i jz din express it...
trying my hard....really hard to accept the way be ignored..

finally, hope u recovered~

他的感受

当我在考虑那答案时，我总会想起他。。
想起我对他说的话。。
想起他对我说的话。。

我不想那样。。
那不是我要的结局。。

怎么办？
为什么我在乎他的感受？

一直以来我总是以同样的性格面对。。
我忘了当事情有不同的角度不同的人数时，
要怎样随机应变。。
我慌了。。
我错了。。
一开始就错了。。
我以为我可以像以往那样，
可是我看来也伤害到我自己。。

kissing you-miranda cosgrove

"...all the question i've been asking in my head,
like are you the one?
should i really trust?
crystal clear it becomes when i kissing you..."

but there is stil the questions in my head...
when the crystal clear wil come??
i'm stil doubt about that...
i'm stil wondering...
i'm stil knocking my head on the wall....

爱情婚姻男人

我向朋友说我不再相信爱情，更不相信天长地久。。
我说我对爱情不再有信心，好男人绝种了。。

她说你爸爸妈妈不就是一个好例子吗？
你哥哥不是吗？
我愣了一下。。

为什么我愣了？
是因为我说不出事实还是我赞同她的说法？

忽然我觉得可笑。。
我没回答。。
我似乎赞同，
但我更加确定爱情婚姻男人靠不住了。。。